Java

And I'm not talking hot beverage. I'm taking my first class in computer programming. I guess if you're going to be a physicist, you have to know how to program a computer. Java is hard. My teacher tries, but I still don't know the difference between objects and classes. My teacher is really heavy on the theory of it, which I understand to a certain degree, but I wish he would just write a program and let us see how it works, so I can try to figure out what the hell is going on here. I really want to know how to do it. It interests me, but it's very frustrating when you don't understand the theory of it.

I had to stop listening to Air America radio for a few days. I was getting stressed out.

I did watch the O'Reilly and Dr. Phil interviews with George Bush. I saw a preview of the Kerry interview on Dr. Phil, and saw O'Reilly issue a challenge to Kerry to come on his show. If you didn't know already, Fox news is conservative. If Bush rarely talks to the White house press corps, but he'll talk to Bill O'Reilly, you know that is proof positive that Fox News is totally right-wing.

Oh well, I'm sick of politics. It's making my head spin. When you try to talk with people about it, you just go in circles. It's very frustrating, and you're never going to change anyone's mind. Unless they are undecided and have completely missed the last 4 years and have just now decided that they need to pay attention.

I'm going to Chicago on Oct 22. Flying. Yay.

Brandon's mom, uncle and aunt are coming Oct 8. We're going to get together for a "meeting of the two parents" dinner or something probably Friday night.

My star trek fanclub meeting is Saturday, and everyone seems to think it's falling apart. I hope it doesn't, but who knows.

My friend La Shana had her labor induced today, and she called me from the hospital earlier this evening. Her website? Zion Cathedral. She's having a boy whose name is Nicholas. Good luck!

My cousins Michael and Tracy and Michael's wife Melanie came to visit this last weekend. She's very pregnant, and is set to have a baby girl in a couple of weeks time.

I, however, am not planning on having children, much to the dissapointment of my mother. :D

Brandon and I are going to start the wedding plans as soon as we get back from Chicago. I will keep everyone posted.

Links are fun!

• Colin Powell on connections between 9-11 and Iraq
  
• Rolling Stone article on Bill O'Reilly
  
• Freeway Blogger: Free Speech! Use it or lose it!
  

Pentagon

So, after taking a look around, I found this:

CLICK HERE

The only thing is that it doesn't explain about the amazing pentalawn. There were several cameras on the pentagon. It's (supposed) to be the most secured building in the country. Part of having a secure building is having surviellence cameras. You're telling me that there is only one camera trained on the front of the pentagon? We've seen those two other planes striking the WTC 8 billion times. You'd think the media would be all over getting that footage of the plane hitting the pentagon. All that's been released from the Pentagon is 5 frames of footage, crappy footage at that. Maybe the government doesn't want people to know where they have cameras installed around the pentagon. Then why don't they tell people that instead of letting rumors run wild. Honesty and government just don't mix. Never have, never will.

A lighter note...

I've already bought my wedding dress... It was the first one I tried on. It was the only one I tried on. I fell in love with it, and it was on sale, so I couldn't resist. I pick it up tomorrow. Check it out here if you want.

Brandon and I are also having a party, sort of an engagement party on Saturday at my friend Shahnon's house. She and her man renovated their whole kitchen/living room/dining room themselves. They have a dining room table that was ordered directly from Thailand and took like 8 months to get. It is an original, crafted specifically for her. I can't wait to get pictures of this whole thing up here so you can see why I'm so psyched just to spend time there. (Besides the fact that Shahnon and Rick rock.)

My HR director just asked me what the hours are for cash control. On a down note: the local psychic here at STTE has predicted another mass lay-off coming soon. I don't think they can lay me off while Shana is out on leave, but who knows. Also, about the psychic: she is never wrong. I know of 5 personal stories where she was exactly right.

I really don't like SprintPCS.

I do really like shopping for stationary though. :D

What a Dick

You know who I'm talking about! Cheney of course! He really is a Dick, he just proved it. From the NY Times (and I'm sure every single other paper out there)

``It's absolutely essential that eight weeks from today, on Nov. 2, we make the right choice, because if we make the wrong choice then the danger is that we'll get hit again and we'll be hit in a way that will be devastating from the standpoint of the United States,'' Cheney told supporters at a town-hall meeting.


That is what they've been trying to say to the American public for months now. I'm amazed that he was just so, honest. That is really how he feels. Of course, it's not based on anything. Attacking Iraq did not make the world safer. It pissed off a whole bunch of people, and has bred a whole new generation of terrorists. They don't "hate us because of our freedom", they hate us because our stupid leaders march into their country, bomb the hell out of it, then don't cut them in for the reconstruction contracts. They are also pissed off because they all know that we went there because of the oil, and they know that the US is totally dependent on Middle East Oil, and wants to play favorites with certain countries (Saudi Arabia) and wants to steal from other countries (Iraq). The United States has 150,000 troops there. Still. Didn't we transfer power a couple of months ago? The death toll is over 1000.

Considering John Kerry's plan for Iraq and the war on terror is not all that different from Bush's, how can Cheney say that there will be a terrorist attack if "the wrong choice" for president is elected? Is he going to make sure that happens? SCARY. Yes, I'm going there. That Dick has connections.

This whole election is crazy. No one is saying the truth, not the media, not the candidates... NO ONE. How many people are really going to sit there and research every little thing that everyone says just to make sure it's true or half-true? Half the people in this country don't even vote, nevermind actually getting involved. It's overwhelming. I've tried to research, but it gets frustrating. So people rely on the nightly news.

Please, for god's sake, don't watch FOX NEWS. All that channel is is a bunch of republicans sitting around patting each other on the back and drinking their kool-aid. The bad thing is, they say that they're "Fair and balanced." I listen to Air America Radio which is a liberal talk station, but they certainly don't claim to be "Fair and Balanced." They are liberals. They think that they're point of view is right and they are not afraid to stand up for it. FOX NEWS likes to say they are "Fair and Balanced" so that they can try to say that their extremely right-wing views are views that the mainstream of America has and should have, then they try to present it as mainstream.

I've been trying to get the comments function on this damn blog to work, so that if anyone is out there actually reading this, you can tell me I'm a dumb bitch, or totally agree with me outloud.

COMMENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!111

If you want to comment, all you have to do is click on the time at the bottom of the post. The whole post will open in its own window, then scroll to the bottom and comment away! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

Holy 9/11 rant batman!

I ended up watching a 2 hour special on A&E about the amateur filmmakers that had decided to capture different aspects of 9/11.

Creepy:

• Seeing a guy jump to his death.
  
• Watching a girl in Brooklyn take a home video of the WTC burning, and having various pieces of debris fall on her about 20 minutes after the attack. She actually picked up papers and showed them to the camera. There was a financial statement, and some other document.
  
• Watching people throw-up after inhaling all the dust.
  
• Seeing the people walking around like zombies, covered in white dust, completely dazed and confused.
  

Inspiring:

• Watching two people scream at each other. They both were yelling about having to pick body parts out of the WTC the day before, and they concluded that they just needed a way to process the horrors that they witnessed. They then hugged, as did the rest of the crowd that was also arguing. (I think this took place in Union Square.)
  
• Seeing the people of New York stand on the road where all the emergency people and Ground Zero workers were going back and forth, and cheering them on.
  
• A group of about 30 people just joined hands the day after, in downtown New York and started singing 'Amazing Grace'
  
• People were just stopping and talking to each other, and this little sparrow, was just walking right in the middle of their little group. When one of the men squatted down to try to touch it, it barely moved away from his hand. It was just in shock. They came to the conclusion that the bird also needed their little circle in order to absorb what had just happened.
  
• Seeing the candle light vigil in Union Square.
  
• Watching them light the two tower lights on March 11, 2002 as a tribute to the WTC.
  

Comforting:

• Knowing that we all felt the same way that day.
  
• Knowing that we as humans all fell into our roles as concerned citizens and do-gooders without even thinking twice about it. Even McDonalds donated food for the cause.
  

I was wondering why 9/11 was so prominent in my mind. DUH. Next week is the three year aniv. That should really be my last rant about that.

School

School started last week. I'm taking a computer programming class and an American History class. They are both online classes, so no real interaction or anything. Online classes don't feel real. Oh well, 6 more credits this semester, 6 next semester, then its time for NAU!

Magic Bullet

So, now I have to go look at official pictures of the pentagon right after the impact on 9/11, and I have to see if there were any plane parts left anywhere because this video freaked me out. Here, have a look.

Pentagon Happenings

I almost forgot one of the main reasons that I'm not voting for Bush. Despite what the supposedly "neutral" commission said, I think that the government knew about 9/11 before it happened, and let it happen for financial/political reasons. There, call me a nutjob, I don't care. That's what I think. There's too many coincidences like...

The Coincidence Theorist's Guide to 9/11

http://rigorousintuition.blogspot.com/

Sunday, August 15, 2004

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I posted an earlier version of this last week at Democratic Underground. I've added a number of more entries, and links for all.

Happy coincidenting!

That governments have permitted terrorist acts against their own people, and have even themselves been perpetrators in order to find strategic advantage is quite likely true, but this is the United States we're talking about.

That intelligence agencies, financiers, terrorists and narco-criminals have a long history together is well established, but the Nugan Hand Bank, BCCI, Banco Ambrosiano, the P2 Lodge, the CIA/Mafia anti-Castro/Kennedy alliance, Iran/Contra and the rest were a long time ago, so there’s no need to rehash all that. That was then, this is now!

That Jonathan Bush’s Riggs Bank has been found guilty of laundering terrorist funds and fined a US-record $25 million must embarrass his nephew George, but it's still no justification for leaping to paranoid conclusions.

That George Bush's brother Marvin sat on the board of the Kuwaiti-owned company which provided electronic security to the World Trade Centre, Dulles Airport and United Airlines means nothing more than you must admit those Bush boys have done alright for themselves.

That George Bush found success as a businessman only after the investment of Osama’s brother Salem and reputed al Qaeda financier Khalid bin Mahfouz is just one of those things - one of those crazy things.

That Osama bin Laden is known to have been an asset of US foreign policy in no way implies he still is.

That al Qaeda was active in the Balkan conflict, fighting on the same side as the US as recently as 1999, while the US protected its cells, is merely one of history's little aberrations.

The claims of Michael Springman, State Department veteran of the Jeddah visa bureau, that the CIA ran the office and issued visas to al Qaeda members so they could receive training in the United States, sound like the sour grapes of someone who was fired for making such wild accusations.

That one of George Bush's first acts as President, in January 2001, was to end the two-year deployment of attack submarines which were positioned within striking distance of al Qaeda's Afghanistan camps, even as the group's guilt for the Cole bombing was established, proves that a transition from one administration to the next is never an easy task.

That so many influential figures in and close to the Bush White House had expressed, just a year before the attacks, the need for a "new Pearl Harbor" before their militarist ambitions could be fulfilled, demonstrates nothing more than the accidental virtue of being in the right place at the right time.

That the company PTECH, founded by a Saudi financier placed on America’s Terrorist Watch List in October 2001, had access to the FAA’s entire computer system for two years before the 9/11 attack, means he must not have been such a threat after all.

That whistleblower Indira Singh was told to keep her mouth shut and forget what she learned when she took her concerns about PTECH to her employers and federal authorities, suggests she lacked the big picture. And that the Chief Auditor for JP Morgan Chase told Singh repeatedly, as she answered questions about who supplied her with what information, that "that person should be killed," suggests he should take an anger management seminar.

That on May 8, 2001, Dick Cheney took upon himself the job of co-ordinating a response to domestic terror attacks even as he was crafting the administration’s energy policy which bore implications for America's military, circumventing the established infrastructure and ignoring the recommendations of the Hart-Rudman report, merely shows the VP to be someone who finds it hard to delegate.

That the standing order which covered the shooting down of hijacked aircraft was altered on June 1, 2001, taking discretion away from field commanders and placing it solely in the hands of the Secretary of Defense, is simply poor planning and unfortunate timing. Fortunately the error has been corrected, as the order was rescinded shortly after 9/11.

That in the weeks before 9/11, FBI agent Colleen Rowley found her investigation of Zacarias Moussaoui so perversely thwarted that her colleagues joked that bin Laden had a mole at the FBI, proves the stress-relieving virtue of humour in the workplace.

That Dave Frasca of the FBI’s Radical Fundamentalist Unit received a promotion after quashing multiple, urgent requests for investigations into al Qaeda assets training at flight schools in the summer of 2001 does appear on the surface odd, but undoubtedly there's a good reason for it, quite possibly classified.

That FBI informant Randy Glass, working an undercover sting, was told by Pakistani intelligence operatives that the World Trade Center towers were coming down, and that his repeated warnings which continued until weeks before the attacks, including the mention of planes used as weapons, were ignored by federal authorities, is simply one of the many "What Ifs" of that tragic day.

That over the summer of 2001 Washington received many urgent, senior-level warnings from foreign intelligence agencies and governments - including those of Germany, France, Great Britain, Russia, Egypt, Israel, Morocco, Afghanistan and others - of impending terror attacks using hijacked aircraft and did nothing, demonstrates the pressing need for a new Intelligence Czar.

That John Ashcroft stopped flying commercial aircraft in July 2001 on account of security considerations had nothing to do with warnings regarding September 11, because he said so to the 9/11 Commission.

That former lead counsel for the House David Schippers says he’d taken to John Ashcroft’s office specific warnings he’d learned from FBI agents in New York of an impending attack – even naming the proposed dates, names of the hijackers and the targets – and that the investigations had been stymied and the agents threatened, proves nothing but David Schipper’s pathetic need for attention.

That Garth Nicolson received two warnings from contacts in the intelligence community and one from a North African head of state, which included specific site, date and source of the attacks, and passed the information to the Defense Department and the National Security Council to evidently no effect, clearly amounts to nothing, since virtually nobody has ever heard of him.

That in the months prior to September 11, self-described US intelligence operative Delmart Vreeland sought, from a Toronto jail cell, to get US and Canadian authorities to heed his warning of his accidental discovery of impending catastrophic attacks is worthless, since Vreeland was a dubious character, notwithstanding the fact that many of his claims have since been proven true.

That FBI Special Investigator Robert Wright claims that agents assigned to intelligence operations actually protect terrorists from investigation and prosecution, that the FBI shut down his probe into terrorist training camps, and that he was removed from a money-laundering case that had a direct link to terrorism, sounds like yet more sour grapes from a disgruntled employee.

That George Bush had plans to invade Afghanistan on his desk before 9/11 demonstrates only the value of being prepared.

The suggestion that securing a pipeline across Afghanistan figured into the White House’s calculations is as ludicrous as the assertion that oil played a part in determining war in Iraq.

That Afghanistan is once again the world’s principal heroin producer is an unfortunate reality, but to claim the CIA is still actively involved in the narcotics trade is to presume bad faith on the part of the agency.

Mahmood Ahmed, chief of Pakistan’s ISI, must not have authorized an al Qaeda payment of $100,000 to Mohammed Atta days before the attacks, and was not meeting with senior Washington officials over the week of 9/11, because I didn’t read anything about him in the official report.

That Porter Goss met with Ahmed the morning of September 11 in his capacity as Chairman of the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence has no bearing whatsoever upon his recent selection by the White House to head the Central Intelligence Agency.

That Goss's congressional seat encompasses the 9/11 hijackers' Florida base of operation, including their flight schools, is precisely the kind of meaningless factoid a conspiracy theorist would bring up.

It's true that George HW Bush and Dick Cheney spent the evening of September 10 alone in the Oval Office, but what's wrong with old colleagues catching up? And it's true that George HW Bush and Shafig bin Laden, Osama's brother, spent the morning of September 11 together at a board meeting of the Carlyle Group, but the bin Ladens are a big family.

That FEMA arrived in New York on Sept 10 to prepare for a scheduled biowarfare drill, and had a triage centre ready to go that was larger and better equipped than the one that was lost in the collapse of WTC 7, was a lucky twist of fate.

Newsweek’s report that senior Pentagon officials cancelled flights on Sept 10 for the following day on account of security concerns is only newsworthy because of what happened the following morning.

That George Bush's telephone logs for September 11 do not exist should surprise no one, given the confusion of the day.

That Mohamed Atta attended the International Officer's School at Maxwell Air Force Base, that Abdulaziz Alomari attended Brooks Air Force Base Aerospace Medical School, that Saeed Alghamdi attended the Defense Language Institute in Monterey merely shows it is a small world, after all.

That Lt Col Steve Butler, Vice Chancellor for student affairs of the Defense Language Institute during Alghamdi's terms, was disciplined, removed from his post and threatened with court martial when he wrote "Bush knew of the impending attacks on America. He did nothing to warn the American people because he needed this war on terrorism. What is...contemptible is the President of the United States not telling the American people what he knows for political gain," is the least that should have happened for such disrespect shown his Commander in Chief.

That Mohammed Atta dressed like a Mafioso, had a stripper girlfriend, smuggled drugs, was already a licensed pilot when he entered the US, enjoyed pork chops, drank to excess and did cocaine, was closer to Europeans than Arabs in Florida, and included the names of defence contractors on his email list, proves how dangerous the radical fundamentalist Muslim can be.

That 43 lbs of heroin was found on board the Lear Jet owned by Wally Hilliard, the owner of Atta’s flight school, just three weeks after Atta enrolled – the biggest seizure ever in Central Florida – was just bad luck. That Hilliard was not charged shows how specious the claims for conspiracy truly are.

That Hilliard’s plane had made 30-round trips to Venezuela with the same passengers who always paid cash, that the plane had been supplied by a pair of drug smugglers who had also outfitted CIA drug runner Barry Seal, and that 9/11 commissioner Richard ben-Veniste had been Seal’s attorney before Seal’s murder, shows nothing but the lengths to which conspiracists will go to draw sinister conclusions.

Reports of insider trading on 9/11 are false, because the SEC investigated and found only respectable investors who will remain nameless involved, and no terrorists, so the windfall profit-taking was merely, as ever, coincidental.

That heightened security for the World Trade Centre was lifted immediately prior to the attacks illustrates that it always happens when you least expect it.

That Hani Hanjour, the pilot of Flight 77, was so incompetent he could not fly a Cessna in August, but in September managed to fly a 767 at excessive speed into a spiraling, 270-degree descent and a level impact of the first floor of the Pentagon, on the only side that was virtually empty and had been hardened to withstand a terrorist attack, merely demonstrates that people can do almost anything once they set their minds to it.

That none of the flight data recorders were said to be recoverable even though they were located in the tail sections, and that until 9/11, no solid-state recorder in a catastrophic crash had been unrecoverable, shows how there's a first time for everything.

That Mohammed Atta left a uniform, a will, a Koran, his driver's license and a "how to fly planes" video in his rental car at the airport means he had other things on his mind.

The mention of Israelis with links to military-intelligence having been arrested on Sept 11 videotaping and celebrating the attacks, of an Israeli espionage ring surveiling DEA and defense installations and trailing the hijackers, and of a warning of impending attacks delivered to the Israeli company Odigo two hours before the first plane hit, does not deserve a response. That the stories also appeared in publications such as Ha'aretz and Forward is a sad display of self-hatred among certain elements of the Israeli media.

That multiple military wargames and simulations were underway the morning of 9/11 – one simulating the crash of a plane into a building; another, a live-fly simulation of multiple hijackings – and took many interceptors away from the eastern seaboard and confused field commanders as to which was a real hijacked aircraft and which was a hoax, was a bizarre coincidence, but no less a coincidence.

That the National Military Command Center ops director asked a rookie substitute to stand his watch at 8:30 am on Sept. 11 is nothing more than bad timing.

That a recording made Sept 11 of air traffic controllers’ describing what they had witnessed, was destroyed by an FAA official who crushed it in his hand, cut the tape into little pieces and dropped them in different trash cans around the building, is something no doubt that overzealous official wishes he could undo.

That the FBI knew precisely which Florida flight schools to descend upon hours after the attacks should make every American feel safer knowing their federal agents are on the ball.

That a former flight school executive believes the hijackers were "double agents," and says about Atta and associates, "Early on I gleaned that these guys had government protection. They were let into this country for a specific purpose," and was visited by the FBI just four hours after the attacks to intimidate him into silence, proves he's an unreliable witness, for the simple reason there is no conspiracy.

That Jeb Bush was on board an aircraft that removed flight school records to Washington in the middle of the night on Sept 12th demonstrates how seriously the governor takes the issue of national security.

To insinuate evil motive from the mercy flights of bin Laden family members and Saudi royals after 9/11 shows the sickness of the conspiratorial mindset.

Le Figaro’s report in October 2001, known to have originated with French intelligence, that the CIA met Osama bin Laden in a Dubai hospital in July 2001, proves again the perfidy of the French.

That the tape in which bin Laden claims responsibility for the attacks was released by the State Department after having been found providentially by US forces in Afghanistan, and depicts a fattened Osama with a broader face and a flatter nose, proves Osama, and Osama alone, masterminded 9/11.

That at the battle of Tora Bora, where bin Laden was surrounded on three sides, Special Forces received no order to advance and capture him and were forced to stand and watch as two Russian-made helicopters flew into the area where bin Laden was believed hiding, loaded up passengers and returned to Pakistan, demonstrates how confusing the modern battlefield can be.

That upon returning to Fort Bragg from Tora Bora, the same Special Operations troops who had been stood down from capturing bin Laden, suffered a unusual spree of murder/suicides, is nothing more than a series of senseless tragedies.

Reports that bin Laden is currently receiving periodic dialysis treatment in a Pakistani medical hospital are simply too incredible to be true.

That the White House went on Cipro September 11 shows the foresightedness of America’s emergency response.

That the anthrax was mailed to perceived liberal media and the Democratic leadership demonstrates only the perversity of the terrorist psyche.

That the anthrax attacks appeared to silence opponents of the Patriot Act shows only that appearances can be deceiving.

That the Ames-strain anthrax was found to have originated at Fort Detrick, and was beyond the capability of all but a few labs to refine, underscores the importance of allowing the investigation to continue without the distraction of absurd conspiracy theories.

That Republican guru Grover Norquist has been found to have aided financiers and supporters of Islamic terror to gain access to the Bush White House, and is a founder of the Islamic Institute, which the Treasury Department believes to be a source of funding for al Qaeda, suggests Norquist is at worst, naive, and at best, needs a wider circle of friends.

That the Department of Justice consistently chooses to see accused 9/11 plotters go free rather than permit the courtroom testimony of al Qaeda leaders in American custody looks bad, but only because we don't have all the facts.

That the White House balked at any inquiry into the events of 9/11, then starved it of funds and stonewalled it, was unfortunate, but since the commission didn't find for conspiracy it's all a non issue anyway.

That the 9/11 commission's executive director and "gatekeeper," Philip Zelikow, was so closely involved in the events under investigation that he testified before the the commission as part of the inquiry, shows only an apparent conflict of interest.

That commission chair Thomas Kean is, like George Bush, a Texas oil executive who had business dealings with reputed al Qaeda financier Khalid bin Mafouz, suggests Texas is smaller than they say it is.

That co-chair Lee Hamilton has a history as a Bush family "fixer," including clearing Bush Sr of the claims arising from the 1980 "October Surprise", is of no concern, since only conspiracists believe there was such a thing as an October Surprise.

That FBI whistleblower Sibel Edmonds accuses the agency of intentionally fudging specific pre-9/11 warnings and harboring a foreign espionage ring in its translation department, and claims she witnessed evidence of the semi-official infrastructure of money-laundering and narcotics trade behind the attacks, is of no account, since John Ashcroft has gagged her with the rare invocation of "State Secrets Privilege," and retroactively classified her public testimony. For the sake of national security, let us speak no more of her.

That, when commenting on Edmond's case, Daniel Ellsberg remarked that Ashcroft could go to prison for his part in a cover-up, suggests Ellsberg is giving comfort to the terrorists, and could, if he doesn't wise up, find himself declared an enemy combatant.

I could go on. And on and on. But I trust you get the point. Which is simply this: there are no secrets, an American government would never accept civilian casualties for geostrategic gain, and conspiracies are for the weak-minded and gullible.

- Posted by Jeff at 5:15 PM

Now, If you managed to sit through all that, good for you. I had to read it in two parts because I was just totally blown away.

Calling all FRIENDS AND FAMILY

No really. I need all y'all addresses up in heer. Shizzle my nizzle and all that crap. Don't worry, I won't be sending out invitations for the wedding for another 3 or four months or so, so I thought I'd really start nagging ya'll right now.

LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D

Calling all Friends!

My stupid handheld ran completly out of power (which had nothing to do with it's stupid owner ;) ) and I need people's addresses and phone numbers. Please send to

deeisanerd@yahoo.com

Especially you, TARA! I tried to send you an email, and your freakin email isn't working. I totally lost your number, and I hate to call your parents to ask for it. CHRISTA, are you out there?! I know that LENAI writes to me sometimes, but I need your physical address.

The thing that sucks is that I didn't have a paper/disk back-up of anyone's address, thinking that my amazing Compaq PC could never fail me (which again, has nothing to do with the owner)

Bush's Speech

So, I watched it from about 7:45pm on (I was at the gym) and I really think that he thinks he's doing the right thing for the country. He really believes that what he is saying is actually happening. If what he was saying was actually happening (IE: Community Colleges/pell-grants/more money/more quality jobs/no lay-offs/easier to handle health care) I would be like everyone of those people in the audience, waving my "W" sign and proudly displaying my "flip-flops." I can't say that it's been easier for me to get money for school (I was not given a pell grant, but recieved a scholarship based on my grades); If I lost my job at Star Trek (which very well might happen, that whole buzz is starting again) I would not be able to get another job for more than 9 or 10 bucks an hour (which most people can't really live on $18,720 a year); My stupid birth control is not covered by my insurance. It's the generic brand of Ortho-tri-cyclen. The only reason I switched to the generic brand was because when I was working at The Aladdin (which is now taken over by Planet Hollywood) they would charge you more for the brand-name than they would for the generic. Now that I've switched plans, my new plan covers the brand-name, but not the generic. IS THAT EASIER!? The doctor said that changing birth control, even going from generic to brand-name, can cause some side-effects. HOW IS THAT MAKING MY LIFE EASIER!!! These drug companies/ insurance companies make so much friggin money, and they can't just get together and put two and two together?!!! Don't they realize in this economy, people are changing jobs all the time, and will end up having different health plans, and for those people that are on maintenence drugs, that it's going to screw up their bodies if they have to keep changing the prescriptions because of some corporate deal between the drug and insurance companies?!!! IS THAT RIGHT?!!! MAN!!! NOW I'M PISSED OFF!!! I was so pissed off a couple of days ago that I actually went to www.senate.gov and looked up the voting records for the senate MYSELF. Yes, I actually went to the source and looked up all the important issues (IMHO) to see how John Kerry ACTUALLY VOTED. I didn't rely on "Swift boat veterans for truth" or "The democratic national committee" I went to the website and FOUND OUT FOR MYSELF! YAY FOR ME! WHEEE!!!

Now, turn off your TV please, and if you want to figure out what's really going on here, go to the internet, find official sources, and read. If you can cast your vote for George Bush and still sleep at night after all that you've read, well, it's your dreams you'll have to deal with. I'm being pretty dramatic hey? Or you could just totally ignore me, and just watch the political ads on TV and FOX NEWS, MSNBC, CNN, and be totally confused like I was. Either that, or be totally polarized one way or the other. John Kerry is not perfect, but it comes down to who can do less damage while they're in office for the next four years.

GWB joke

One day in the future, George Bush has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil's waiting for him. "I don't know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got three people here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves." Bush thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to the first room. In it was Richard Nixon in a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No," George said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that all day long." The devil led him to the next room. In it was Newt Gingrich with a sledge hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented George. The devil opened a third door. In it, Bush saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms tied over his head, with his legs restrained in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Bush took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this." The devil, pleased that he made his decision, smiled and said, OK, Monica, you're free to go.

--Random forwarded joke.

Jacked up(TM)

A few things...

I'M ENGAGED! Yes, to Brandon! WHEEEEEEE!!!!!

I will have a detailed report of all of the trip soon, hopefully, with a few pictures. We took about 700 pictures and about 6 hours of video, all of which is PG (for me having a potty mouth), so don't cringe. ;)

But today is Jacked Up(TM), hence the title. I was driving to work this morning and I spot a very familiar purple truck on the side of the road, with most of it's front end smashed in. I see my brother's boyfriend standing there, talking to a cop, and I pull over to help. His arm was all bruised from when the air bag went off, but he's ok. It was both of their faults according to the cops (which I agree with) but the other driver tried to argue about it (which is stupid) and the cop just cut him off before he could even start. So I was an hour and fifteen minutes late to work, which was ok, I had called and told my supervisor at around seven thirty in the morning.

The other Jacked Up(TM) happening is that my boss just got fired. RANDOM. Despite leaving me here for 12 hours on certain days, and being slightly absent-minded, I can't imagine why they would have fired him. I think it had something to do with the IRS and tips or some such thing. We all made a pretty good team. He kept out of our hair for the most part, and he and my supervisor had a certain understanding. They told us in a very office space way (taking us into one of our conference rooms, and saying that _____ is not with the company anymore) and not telling us why, but that some guy is taking over on Monday, and that this other guy sitting in front of you will be taking over for the rest of today. It sucks, he was a silly boss, plus he was a total liberal tree-hugger and we could just talk and talk about politics. My supervisor was so pissed off that she went home for the day.

I will see her tomorrow because she is throwing a baby shower for my other co-worker who is going on maternity leave next week. I will be getting weekends off starting in a couple of weeks, but not soon enough for me to be able to go to the Utah Shakespeare festival. BOOOOO. My boyfriend and some friends are going to Utah for that next weekend, and that same weekend, my friends are renting a boat for two days and are going camping in Arizona. I'll just be at home, by myself, curled up in fetal position rocking back and forth sucking my thumb and holding my ear, in the corner. No, not really. I'll probably get all of my school work done early, than clean the entire house. Or I'll do nothing.

School starts on Monday! I got another scholarship for this year. $500 each semester. YAY! Since I'm only taking two classes this semester, the reimbursement check came yesterday for $250! That's EXTRA. Left over from my classes being paid off. I paid $147 dollars for my books, so that leaves me with a positive net $103! I need it. I took those two weeks off for my trip UNPAID.

Thought of the day: You never know when your time is up, so please enjoy. And don't be an asshole.

Sarah McLachlan

WOW. That's all I have to say. The most amazing show I've ever seen. EVER. It deserves a "BEST. SHOW. EVER." I only remember the two songs that she opened with in terms of order of songs, and a few that went together, but man! I was crying, singing, and feeling completely overwhelmed by her breathtaking voice.

 
She opened with Fallen (while I was standing in the drink line) then went into World On Fire (while I was still in the drink line.) Then she sang a verse of You Are My Sunshine that lead into Hold On. Then, not in the right order:

 
• Sweet Surrender
   
• Adia
   
• Witness (which was the best song of the night - IMHO)
   
• Stupid
   
• Drifting
   
• Fear (Which she started in a low octave for the first verse, then jumped to the next octave for the rest of the song - GOOSEBUMPS)
   
• Fumbling Towards Ecstasy
   
• I will Remeber You
   
• Building a Mystery  (when I was in the bathroom - after two drinks that's what happens)
   
• Possession
   
• Wait
   
• Mary
   
• Elsewhere (My favorite SM song)
   
• Ice (also really amazing)
   
• Ice Cream (with audience participation)
   
• Trainwreck
   
• Answer 
   
• Push (which she dedicated to her husband - the drummer Ash Sood) /Angel (Piano Solos)
   
• Time
   
• Perfect Girl
   
• Dirty Little Secret (ended the show with that one, I think)
  

 
I kept waiting for her to sing I Love You, Good Enough, Dear God but alas, t'was not so. :(
 
But still. 26 songs. 2 encores. 2 and a half hours on non-stop Sarah McLachlan. I'm sad that it's over. I hope I won't have to wait another 7 years to see her again.
 

Our Trip to Canada

So Brandon and I are going on our roadtrip in 19 days! The countdown begins! We reserved our room for our 2 year anniversary in Edmonton and we're staying at Hotel MacDonald in their Chateau Suite. It's two stories (built into the turret of the hotel - see the picture from the website to know what I'm talking about) and has a jetted bathtub with seperate shower stall. Full breakfast in their fine dining restaurant comes with the room as does a breathtaking view of the North Saskatchewan River (which is probably brown, but hey, at least it's a river.)  For our first night in Edmonton, My Uncle Pat and Auntie Janet are letting us stay with them, which is totally awesome. Our aniv. night is the next night, and then for the next two nights we're staying at The Met Hotel on Whyte Ave. I can't wait! I'm freaking out over here!
 
I celebrated Auntie Die Die's birthday with her on Friday night. We had chinese food and watched VH1's "I love the 90's." It was fun. Uncle Danny got back after 10pm with a Carvel ice cream cake. MMMMMMMmmmmmmmmm....
 
I still have to get my car registered (my registration expires while I'm on vacation) get my A/C checked out (to make sure we don't lose it during our trip) and I have to finish Brandon's aniv. present. Damn. So much to do, so little time. Oh well.

Kerry/Edwards 2004?

I just attended my first rally, and it was interesting. I met with some other people through Democracy for America last night, which was kind of disappointing. There was no host, and because it was my first time doing anything political outside of talking about it with my family (which always goes well) or friends so I had no idea what to expect. It was nice to meet with other people who think the way that I do.

Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.


See this site: http://www.johnkerryisadouchebagbutimvotingforhimanyway.com


That's kind of how I feel.


Wil Wheaton's new book Just a Geek is out. I'm planning on buying it directly from him at the convention.

Viruses (Virusi)!

So, I'm on Ann Coulter's website, and I decide to venture off into republican land for a while and what do you know?!!!! I get a virus on my computer! Now, you might think I'm one of these crazy liberal lefties who likes to blame anyone and everyone, especially the right, for anything bad that might happen ever just because I am an America-hating, communist, fancy pants elitist, even if it such an event would only happen once. But guess what? Ever since I've been trying to see the right POV, my probing the other side has gotten me 4 viruses. (Virusi?) I go to lefty websites all the time! NO VIRUSI! The only reason I know it's from certain websites is because as soon as I visit an infected site, my virus program starts running, and freaks out. So what have I learned from all this? Not a lot from the right, seeing as I can't even access their websites without having to have my network administrator delete trojan virusi. I learned that you have to read print media to learn anything real about the right. OH! That's it! They don't want to give you FREE information, they want you to have to BUY their books! Wow, I see the light. ;)

July 4th weekend

Sunday was great! We rented the boat, cruised around, found a beach/alcove with warm water, drank, ate, swam, floated, listened to music and got in trouble with the boat police for having people hanging out on the front and the back of the boat while it was in motion. All in all, great times. I have pictures in my camera that I will have to display hopefully this weekend.

Today

So, I asked my supervisor if I had to come in early on Monday, seeing as it was a holiday and nobody would be at corporate to recieve our early reports (which is the only reason I come in early on Monday mornings.) She asked our boss and he said that everything is the same for Monday, meaning come in early because(I assumed) the people would be at corporate and we would have to get the reports out as usual in a timely fashion. So after the second night in a row of 5 hours sleep, I come draggin into work this morning. I start doing reports and something is not adding up. Time is ticking away, and I just can't think anymore, so I call my boss (who is in as well - he came in shortly after I did) to ask him if he could please take a look at this report because I can't see straight. He tells me not to worry about it, we're under no time constraints this morning. :0 I was slightly stunned for a minute, and then started to brew. Later, talking to him, I said, "If we're under no time constraints, why did I have to come in so early?" He said that, "He likes to get these things taken care of right away." Then later, as I'm thinking through this situation, I'm realizing that I'm the only one here. My supervisor is not here, and my boss came to work in a tank-top and shorts, so he's probably going home. We close at 6pm, but I usually leave at 4pm on Mondays. So I ask him, "Are you staying?" He laughs and says, "No..." I say, "So, I'm supposed to work for 12 hours today?" He says, "Oh yeah. Nobody told you that hey?" Then I say to him, "Well, if you would have let me come in at the regular time this morning then this wouldn't be an issue." He says, "Have you forgotten who you're talking to?" Then he starts joking around, "The shit rolls down the hill, and near the bottom is gets bigger and faster." So later (about an hour later) he can sense that I'm not happy about this situation. He says, "So, you OK with this?" This time I laughed at him and said, "And if I'm not, then what? You're not going to stay, nothings going to change, and I'll still be here till 6pm." He thanked me and then left (around 9am). So here I am, at work, for 12 hours without knowing about it first. Don't you think that they should have at least told me that on Friday when I called instead of letting me just do it without them having to tell me that face to face? Man! I'm pissed. I can't wait for my vacation already! Only 5 more weeks!

Days go by...

Thank you to the Hendrey family for reading and sending me emails and phone calls about that last post. I've never forgotten how much your family meant to me when I was growing up.


Happy Canada Day *cough* 2 days ago *cough*

The last Canada Day that I celebrated we went to the river valley and watched the fire works. I think it was me, Tara, Boutie, Andy, Jeff, Stephanie, Curtis and Troy? That was, I think, in 2001? Somebody help me on this one... Tara? We all got seperated and it ended up being only me, Tara and Boutie, but it was still fun, and fucking crowded. Not to mention all the drunk people. It's hard to have fireworks when the sun goes down in the summer, because it doesn't get dark until 11pm or so. So here in Las Vegas, they're going to be setting off fireworks at 8pm. Oh well. I won't be in the city....

Happy USA Day

I will be on a boat on the Colorado River, sipping umbrella-laden drinks, avoiding all the terrorist plots to plant floating beer cooler bombs on the water. My coworker is working for me on a Sunday and this will be the first Sunday in 4 months, make that the first WHOLE DAY IN FOUR MONTHS that I've been able to see Brandon. I haven't seen him in the daylight for a while, we have totally different days off, and I'm tired on his days off, and he's tired on my days off, not to mention that he works until 9pm sometimes (after starting at 9am). He is such a good man. He really makes me feel needed and wanted and is always there when I need to vent or laugh or tickle. Did you know that we have never had a fight? We've never yelled at each other. There's been dissagreements, but it's never gotten to the "Cops" level or even to the shouting level. He is just so laid back about things and has such a grounded view and perspective. Ooops. I just drifted into a Brandon moment. :D Where was I? Oh yes, the boat. Lisa, Doug and Gerrad are friends of Heather and James from Seattle and they're here for the weekend so they will be on the boat with us. As for tonight, we're having a gathering at my house, sort of a pot-luck type of event, just to chill with the homies in the crib yo. And then we're going to try to get up at like ass-crack in the morning to get out to Willow Beach to pick up our boat by 9am. HA! Heather is making her famous tuna salad sandwiches with gluten-free bread. Lisa and I went shopping yesterday at Pier 1 and bought these cute little toothpick sandwich holder-togetherers with little palm trees and felt monkey's with coconuts on them. Total cheese, but really cute. I will have plenty of pictures from that event. I hope everyone enjoys the holiday!

Fitting Memorial

Ten years ago today, June 21, 1994, my friend's father Johnny Hendrey passed away suddenly at the age of 37. He really was a father figure to me. He is the one who forced me to sit and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation on Friday nights when I would sleep over at the Hendrey's house. Look where that got me, eh? I can honestly say that without those evenings, I would not be where I am today. I would be a totally different person. So I wanted to thank him outloud for all that he did for me while he was here, and thank him for the path that he has sent me on.


It's fitting that today the first commercial spaceflight took place. Johnny was always a big space buff and liked to talk about the possibilities of life on other worlds. We even swore we saw a UFO one night while sitting out on in his backyard, freezing to death, looking at the stars and talking about life. Every time I look at the stars I always know that he's out there somewhere experiencing all the amazing wonders of the universe that we would always end up talking about on those Friday nights.


Thank you, Johnny.

Things I'm Happy About

• My Boyfriend
  
• My Uncle Danny moving to Las Vegas
  
• Getting to see my Auntie Kathy, Carol, Uncle Steve, Uncle Fred and cousin Michael all in the same month.
  
• My summer trip to Canada
  
• Having my job back at Star Trek
  
• Living on my own
  
• Tobey (one of the wiener dogs I live with) giving me toe kisses in the morning.
  
• Losing 38 lbs.
  

Just thought I'd break from Politics for 3 days, to see if I had any reason to live. Man, politics can really get you down. It's so frustrating. I just needed to take a step back for a while. I don't know if I want to get as involved as I thought I did, now that I've had a break from it and can finally see good things in the world. I do want to stay informed, but not obsessed.


I went to Classmates.com today and had a good laugh. I saw Darren Bell, Blayne Alberts (one of my ex's) *shiver*, Warhorse, Mike Wordell (who I always had mad crush on because I thought he looked like Chris O'Donnell.) Too funny. I really hope we all have a reunion sometime. HOLY SHIT. In three years, will be our 10 year high school reunion. I wonder who plans those, or if they're just a myth that is used when you're graduating to make everything seem not-so-final. I'll have to see if anyone's there when I take Brandon there this summer and ask them what the procedure is for organizing one of these events. I wonder if they would be willing to release information to contact people. I know that on Classmates.com you have to pay for an upgraded membership in order to contact anyone, and that would suck because I know that most people don't want to have to do that. I wonder if I know enough people still in Edmonton in order to organize something like that? I'm sure some people don't want to see each other ever again, but I do! We'll see.


I think a little while back I mentioned that I had a story that I wanted to tell, but that I had to wait until school was over in order to have time to do it. Well here goes...


About a month back, Brandon was invited to a wedding reception for one of his co-workers. It was on a Saturday afternoon, so I really had no intention of going because I was working. He called me shortly before 6pm (I get off work at 6pm) to tell me that he was still there, had had a few beers and wanted me to come hang out for a little while. I told him OK and met him at this guy's house where the wedding reception was taking place. I met them and they started to show me pictures of the actual wedding. As I'm flipping through, one of the little girls in the pictures looks really familiar. So I ask the groom who that little girl is. He tells me that that's his daughter. Then (because he's had a few beers) he tells me this whole rant on how he's in a bitter custody battle with his ex that's been going on since she's been born and how his ex is crazy. Then the bride chimes in on how she likes to piss off the ex by being a bitch and all that. As this is all happening, time seems to stand still. I'm starting to make connections, then it hits me like a tonne of bricks.... *BAM!* I know this guys's story!


*FLASHBACK TO A COUPLE OF SEMESTERS AGO*
I had a lab partner who will remain nameless for Chemistry. She was a single mom and had moved to Las Vegas to escape her crazy abusive ex-husband. She's been in and out of court ever since the little girl was born. She was always talking to her ex through her lawyer, and they were both trying everything that they could in order to make the other's life more misirable. I would spend alot of time with this lab partner. We had a 3 hour lab, plus class, plus 6hrs a week usually of finishing up our labs. I really got to know her pretty well. She really told me everything, about how her husband totally changed when they got married and how he was a truck driver. She also told me that he'd moved to Las Vegas shortly after she did to stalk her. She had a restraining order on him and everything.
*FLASHBACK TO CURRENT*


SO I'M FREAKING OUT! This guy IS the crazy ex-husband that I'd been hearing about for a whole semester! AND HE'S GETTING REMARRIED!!! So I had to hold this in while we sat there chatting for another hour or so. I'm ready to burst. My boyfriend is in a state of disbelief when I tell him what was going on in the car after the party. He sort of remembered me telling him about my lab partner and stuff, so he was in a daze after hearing all of that shit about his co-worker that he's known casually for the last year and a half.


Small world hey? There's close to 2 million people in Las Vegas and here I am, freaking out. I still get freaked out when I think about it too much, so I think I'll go do some laundry to get my mind off it.

Every vote for John Kerry is a vote for Al-Queda???!!!

On CNN WOLF BLITZER REPORTS Aired May 27, 2004 - 17:00 ET Kelli Arena, CNN Justice Correspondent started the fear with the following remarks:

Miles, it's something that we've heard a lot about, a possible al Qaeda plot to influence elections. But there's their hasn't been a lot of discussion about what the objectives might be. So we checked in with some terror experts to find out.

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

ARENA (voice-over): Terror experts say it's not about who wins the U.S. election, it's about impact.


M.J. GOHEL, ASIA-PACIFIC FOUNDATION: If, for instance, say, George Bush was in the lead in the opinion polls right now and an attack took place and that changes the equation as it did, for instance in Spain, then al Qaeda would feel that it has scored a major success.


ARENA: Al Qaeda affiliates attacked Spain just before its elections in March. Some suggests that cemented an overwhelming win for the socialist party.


ASHCROFT: We believe, for example, the attack in Spain is one that is viewed by al Qaeda as particularly effective in advancing al Qaeda objectives.


ARENA: The attack did result in Spain pulling its troops out of Iraq. Experts say the less Western influence in Iraq, the better for al Qaeda.


GOHEL: Iraq is a key battleground for the terrorists. The terrorists want to turn Iraq into another Taliban Afghanistan. They would like to see the premature withdrawal of the U.S.-led coalition forces.


ARENA: Neither John Kerry nor the president has said troops pulled out of Iraq any time soon. But there is some speculation that al Qaeda believes it has a better chance of winning in Iraq if John Kerry is in the White House.


BEN VENZKE, INTELCENTER: Al Qaeda feels that Bush is, even despite casualties, right or wrong for staying there is going to stay much longer than possibly what they might hope a Democratic administration would.


(END VIDEOTAPE)


ARENA: While U.S. officials say they're concerned of an attack as early as this summer, some experts believe if al Qaeda strikes with the election in mind it will do that just before November 2.


And while much attention is focused on the political conventions, experts say al Qaeda usually hits targets that it can hit on any day of the week -- Miles.

This is Bush's plan for Iraq: (From White House.gov)

"We will hand over authority to a sovereign Iraqi government, help establish security, continue rebuilding Iraq's infrastructure, encourage more international support, and move toward a national election that will bring forward new leaders empowered by the Iraqi people."

This is Kerry's plan for Iraq: (From John Kerry.com)

"We need a massive training effort to build an Iraqi security force that can actually provide security for the Iraqi people...An international High Commissioner should be authorized by the UN Security Council to organize the political transition to Iraqi sovereignty and the reconstruction of Iraq in conjunction with the new Iraqi government...NATO agreement to take on this mission should be reached no later than the NATO summit in late June.

THEY ARE THE SAME. The next slogan, "Every vote for John Kerry is a vote for Al-Queda!" WAIT A MINUTE! Al-Queda in IRAQ?!!!!!! Oh shit. Here we go again with the terrorists/Al-Queda/Iraq thing that worked so well on the American public just before we invaded and occupied Iraq.

From White House.govFeb. 8, 2003
BUSH:"Senior members of Iraqi intelligence and al Qaeda have met at least eight times since the early 1990s. Iraq has sent bomb-making and document forgery experts to work with al Qaeda. Iraq has also provided al Qaeda with chemical and biological weapons training. And an al Qaeda operative was sent to Iraq several times in the late 1990s for help in acquiring poisons and gases."

OK, so then we have this: From White House.gov March 23, 2004)

President Bush sought all possible links to the attacks of 9/11, including Iraq. Once advised that there was no evidence that Iraq was responsible for September 11, the President told his National Security Council that Iraq was not on the agenda.

So here we are again, trying to somehow connect Iraq and Al-Queda. DON'T FALL FOR IT. This is so freaking obvious to anyone who reads or pays attention. I wonder how often we're going to start hearing this over and over. JOHN KERRY IS NOT GOING TO DO ANYTHING DIFFERENTLY WHEN PUT INTO OFFICE ABOUT IRAQ. I don't know if they're anything else I can add. Just read this and pass it on to other people, so they don't get sucked into the propaganda machine.

Gateway

I just got off the phone with Gateway customer service. That operation has gone downhill. When you are talking to them, you can hear the echo of every word that you speak, which is very distracting. Also, the lady who "helped" me didn't actually put me on hold, she just put the phone down on her desk. How did I know this? I could hear the phone vibrating everytime she would strike the keyboard. Not to mention that she didn't say two words to me during the 5 minutes I was on "hold." The best part is the way she answered my question at first. This is how the call went:


Her:"Thank-you for calling Gateway Customer Service my name is Shana and my badge number is "blah blah blah" (she didn't actually say blah) how can I help you today."


Me:"I was wondering if I still qualify for that free windows XP upgrage that I was supposed to get when I first bought my computer in 2001."


Her:"No."


Me:"No? Um, why not?"


Her:"It's expired."


Me:"Could you check in your records to see if they did anything about this the first time I called about it a year ago?"


Her: Puts the phone down for 5 minutes. For all I know, she went out, had a cigarette, got a coke and picked up the phone 5 minutes later.


Her:"That has expired, and they will not honor that agreement."


Me:"Oh. Well, how much do you guys charge for a windows XP upgrade?"


Her:"$112.00 including shipping and handling."


Me:"Ok. I'll call back."


Her: CLICK.


Nice hey? I realize it was a shot in the dark anyway, but she didn't even want to check to see if she could do anything for me. I'll call back next week and ask someone else. If you get bad customer service, just try calling back until you get someone who knows what they're doing. I'm sure she could have given me the upgrade for free, but she was too busy not caring and getting annoyed at stupid customers like me who think that I come first! Well I NEVER!

Star Trek Convention

It's that time of year again when all Trekkies converge on the Las Vegas Hilton for the 3rd annual "Official Paramount/Creation Star Trek Convention." July 29th thru August 1st, 2004. This is who's going to be there:

• William Shatner (Captain Kirk)
  
• Leonard Nimoy (Spock)
  
• Kate Mulgrew (Captain Janeway)
  
• Brent Spiner (Data)
  
• Colm Meany (Miles O'Brien)
  
• George Takei (Sulu)
  
• Walter Koenig (Chekov)
  
• Marina Sirtis (Counsellor Deanna Troi)
  
• Tim Russ (Tuvok)
  
• Roxann Dawson (B'Elana Torres)
  
• Sally Kellerman (Dr Dehner from OS)
  
• Ethan Phillips (Neelix)
  
• David Gerrold (writer of "The Trouble With Tribbles")
  
• Alice Krige (The Borg Queen)
  
• Linda Park (Hoshi Sato)
  
• Tom Hardy (Shinzon from Nemesis)
  
• Anthony Montgomery (Travis Mayweather)
  
• Wil Wheaton (Wesley Crusher, internet guru)
  
• Cirroc Lofton (Jake Sisko)
  
• Eugene Roddenberry (Son of the creator of Star Trek)
  
• Majel Barrett Roddenberry (Wife of the creator of Star Trek)
  
• Todd Bryant and Spice Williams (Captain Klaa and Visis of Star Trek V)
  
• Jeffrey Combs (Shran, Weyoun, Brunt)
  
• Casey Biggs (Damar)
  
• Vaughn Armstrong (Admiral Forrest)
  
• Chase Masterson (Leeta)
  
• Max Grodenchik (Rom)
  

I won't be able to attend most of the convention because I'll be working, but I will try to make it for Thursday and Friday. Not to sound like a total convention snob or anything, but I've seen ALL of these people except for one. TOM HARDY. I feel like I should meet him just because he has the same last name as my boyfriend. I want to see if his teeth are really that bad in person.


I do alot of complaining. Sorry. This is where I come to vent. I'm really not this pissed off all the time. I do happy things, really. One more thing to complain about, my boyfriend is out of town this weekend and I'm getting a cold. Oh! Here comes another one (complaint)... I had to buy 4 books for the English 102 class that I'm taking this summer. It's only 4 weeks. YIKES.

WHY BUSH?

I don't understand why any sane person would want George W. Bush as our next president. It's not just him. I know that. It's his whole administration. Was the last administration like this? YES. Did they change anything? NO. I just feel that this time around, there are so many horrible things going on. From the prisoner abuse, to the WMD's, trying to link Al-Queda and Saddam Hussein, the Bush family ties to Saudi Arabia and Osama Bin Laden's family, the Patriot Act I & II and the list goes on and on. Yesterday, I heard on the news that the administration is worried that the terrorist will attack this summer and that they will try to influence our elections. Well, this thing can go one of three ways:

• They could attack around the election and the current White House will be forced to suspend the election until they can get things under control. Which would be a positive for Bush.
  
• They could attack during the summer, and Bush's approval rating will soar high enough to be re-elected for another four years. Another positive for Bush.
  
• There will be no terrorist attack, and George W. Bush will lose the next election.
  

Isn't it sad when the only way that Bush is going to be re-elected is if there is a terrorist attack? I hate to speculate, but I'm sure his camp has thought of this. Is this really going to make him want to stop a terrorist attack? I should think not. He said he was going to run the white house like a business. Are you loyal to your country or your company? Which one is going to pay you more? That's all any of this really boils down to is money and power. SAD. I don't think things will ever change, but I'm not going to just sit back and bitch and moan about how bad things are. I'm going to take action. I'm going to sit here and predict the next terrorist attack, and if I'm right, they you all have to go vote for Kerry in the next election (if we have one.) READY?

August 7th, 2004

So what happens if I'm wrong? If I'm off? I'll try to finish reading Ann Coulter's book Treason. Oh, regardless of who wins(?!) I'm also going to volunteer for the democratic party, decorate my car with stickers and maybe, If I have enough time, start a website for the regime change in Washington. And if there is a terrorist attack, before you start putting those american flags on your car again, please read and be very aware of what is going on. I was totally sucked in to the wave of patriotism just after 9/11 to the point where I actually had my name put on a list at a flag store for a car flag. WOW. That is hard-core. Do not let free-speech turn into "terrorist-you-are-with-us-or-against-us" crap again.

Just for shits and giggles, here's Al Gore's speech from a few days ago:

George W. Bush promised us a foreign policy with humility. Instead, he has brought us humiliation in the eyes of the world.


He promised to "restore honor and integrity to the White House." Instead, he has brought deep dishonor to our country and built a durable reputation as the most dishonest President since Richard Nixon.


Honor? He decided not to honor the Geneva Convention. Just as he would not honor the United Nations, international treaties, the opinions of our allies, the role of Congress and the courts, or what Jefferson described as "a decent respect for the opinion of mankind." He did not honor the advice, experience and judgment of our military leaders in designing his invasion of Iraq. And now he will not honor our fallen dead by attending any funerals or even by permitting photos of their flag-draped coffins.


How did we get from September 12th , 2001, when a leading French newspaper ran a giant headline with the words "We Are All Americans Now" and when we had the good will and empathy of all the world -- to the horror that we all felt in witnessing the pictures of torture in Abu Ghraib.


To begin with, from its earliest days in power, this administration sought to radically destroy the foreign policy consensus that had guided America since the end of World War II. The long successful strategy of containment was abandoned in favor of the new strategy of "preemption." And what they meant by preemption was not the inherent right of any nation to act preemptively against an imminent threat to its national security, but rather an exotic new approach that asserted a unique and unilateral U.S. right to ignore international law wherever it wished to do so and take military action against any nation, even in circumstances where there was no imminent threat. All that is required, in the view of Bush's team is the mere assertion of a possible, future threat - and the assertion need be made by only one person, the President.


More disturbing still was their frequent use of the word "dominance" to describe their strategic goal, because an American policy of dominance is as repugnant to the rest of the world as the ugly dominance of the helpless, naked Iraqi prisoners has been to the American people. Dominance is as dominance does. Dominance is not really a strategic policy or political philosophy at all. It is a seductive illusion that tempts the powerful to satiate their hunger for more power still by striking a Faustian bargain. And as always happens - sooner or later - to those who shake hands with the devil, they find out too late that what they have given up in the bargain is their soul.


One of the clearest indications of the impending loss of intimacy with one's soul is the failure to recognize the existence of a soul in those over whom power is exercised, especially if the helpless come to be treated as animals, and degraded. We also know - and not just from De Sade and Freud - the psychological proximity between sexual depravity and other people's pain. It has been especially shocking and awful to see these paired evils perpetrated so crudely and cruelly in the name of America.
Those pictures of torture and sexual abuse came to us embedded in a wave of news about escalating casualties and growing chaos enveloping our entire policy in Iraq. But in order understand the failure of our overall policy, it is important to focus specifically on what happened in the Abu Ghraib prison, and ask whether or not those actions were representative of who we are as Americans? Obviously the quick answer is no, but unfortunately it's more complicated than that.


There is good and evil in every person. And what makes the United States special in the history of nations is our commitment to the rule of law and our carefully constructed system of checks and balances. Our natural distrust of concentrated power and our devotion to openness and democracy are what have lead us as a people to consistently choose good over evil in our collective aspirations more than the people any other nation.


Our founders were insightful students of human nature. They feared the abuse of power because they understood that every human being has not only "better angels" in his nature, but also an innate vulnerability to temptation - especially the temptation to abuse power over others. Our founders understood full well that a system of checks and balances is needed in our constitution because every human being lives with an internal system of checks and balances that cannot be relied upon to produce virtue if they are allowed to attain an unhealthy degree of power over their fellow citizens. Listen then to the balance of internal impulses described by specialist Charles Graner when confronted by one of his colleagues, Specialist Joseph M. Darby, who later became a courageous whistleblower. When Darby asked him to explain his actions documented in the photos, Graner replied: "The Christian in me says it's wrong, but the Corrections Officer says, 'I love to make a groan man piss on himself." What happened at the prison, it is now clear, was not the result of random acts by "a few bad apples," it was the natural consequence of the Bush Administration policy that has dismantled those wise constraints and has made war on America's checks and balances.


The abuse of the prisoners at Abu Ghraib flowed directly from the abuse of the truth that characterized the Administration's march to war and the abuse of the trust that had been placed in President Bush by the American people in the aftermath of September 11th.


There was then, there is now and there would have been regardless of what Bush did, a threat of terrorism that we would have to deal with. But instead of making it better, he has made it infinitely worse. We are less safe because of his policies. He has created more anger and righteous indignation against us as Americans than any leader of our country in the 228 years of our existence as a nation -- because of his attitude of contempt for any person, institution or nation who disagrees with him.
He has exposed Americans abroad and Americans in every U.S. town and city to a greater danger of attack by terrorists because of his arrogance, willfulness, and bungling at stirring up hornet's nests that pose no threat whatsoever to us. And by then insulting the religion and culture and tradition of people in other countries. And by pursuing policies that have resulted in the deaths of thousands of innocent men, women and children, all of it done in our name.


President Bush said in his speech Monday night that the war in Iraq is "the central front in the war on terror." It's not the central front in the war on terror, but it has unfortunately become the central recruiting office for terrorists. [Dick Cheney said, "This war may last the rest of our lives.] The unpleasant truth is that President Bush's utter incompetence has made the world a far more dangerous place and dramatically increased the threat of terrorism against the United States. Just yesterday, the International Institute of Strategic Studies reported that the Iraq conflict " has arguable focused the energies and resources of Al Qaeda and its followers while diluting those of the global counterterrorism coalition." The ISS said that in the wake of the war in Iraq Al Qaeda now has more than 18,000 potential terrorists scattered around the world and the war in Iraq is swelling its ranks.
The war plan was incompetent in its rejection of the advice from military professionals and the analysis of the intelligence was incompetent in its conclusion that our soldiers would be welcomed with garlands of flowers and cheering crowds. Thus we would not need to respect the so-called Powell doctrine of overwhelming force.


There was also in Rumsfeld's planning a failure to provide security for nuclear materials, and to prevent widespread lawlessness and looting.
Luckily, there was a high level of competence on the part of our soldiers even though they were denied the tools and the numbers they needed for their mission. What a disgrace that their families have to hold bake sales to buy discarded Kevlar vests to stuff into the floorboards of the Humvees! Bake sales for body armor.
And the worst still lies ahead. General Joseph Hoar, the former head of the Marine Corps, said "I believe we are absolutely on the brink of failure. We are looking into the abyss."


When a senior, respected military leader like Joe Hoar uses the word "abyss", then the rest of us damn well better listen. Here is what he means: more American soldiers dying, Iraq slipping into worse chaos and violence, no end in sight, with our influence and moral authority seriously damaged.


Retired Marine Corps General Anthony Zinni, who headed Central Command before becoming President Bush's personal emissary to the Middle East, said recently that our nation's current course is "headed over Niagara Falls."
The Commander of the 82nd Airborne Division, Army Major General Charles H. Swannack, Jr., asked by the Washington Post whether he believes the United States is losing the war in Iraq, replied, "I think strategically, we are." Army Colonel Paul Hughes, who directed strategic planning for the US occupation authority in Baghdad, compared what he sees in Iraq to the Vietnam War, in which he lost his brother: "I promised myself when I came on active duty that I would do everything in my power to prevent that ... from happening again. " Noting that Vietnam featured a pattern of winning battles while losing the war, Hughes added "unless we ensure that we have coherence in our policy, we will lose strategically."


The White House spokesman, Dan Bartlett was asked on live television about these scathing condemnations by Generals involved in the highest levels of Pentagon planning and he replied, "Well they're retired, and we take our advice from active duty officers."


But amazingly, even active duty military officers are speaking out against President Bush. For example, the Washington Post quoted an unnamed senior General at the Pentagon as saying, " the current OSD (Office of the Secretary of Defense) refused to listen or adhere to military advice." Rarely if ever in American history have uniformed commanders felt compelled to challenge their commander in chief in public.
The Post also quoted an unnamed general as saying, "Like a lot of senior Army guys I'm quite angry" with Rumsfeld and the rest of the Bush Administration. He listed two reasons. "I think they are going to break the Army," he said, adding that what really incites him is "I don't think they care."


In his upcoming book, Zinni blames the current catastrophe on the Bush team's incompetence early on. "In the lead-up to the Iraq war, and its later conduct," he writes, "I saw at a minimum, true dereliction, negligence and irresponsibility, at worst, lying, incompetence and corruption."


Zinni's book will join a growing library of volumes by former advisors to Bush -- including his principal advisor on terrorism, Richard Clarke; his principal economic policy advisor, former Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill, former Ambassador Joe Wilson, who was honored by Bush's father for his service in Iraq, and his former Domestic Adviser on faith-based organizations, John Dilulio, who said, "There is no precedent in any modern White House for what is going on in this one: a complete lack of a policy apparatus. What you've got is everything, and I mean everything, run by the political arm. It's the reign of the Mayberry Machiavellis."


Army Chief of Staff General Eric Shinseki told Congress in February that the occupation could require "several hundred thousand troops." But because Rumsfeld and Bush did not want to hear disagreement with their view that Iraq could be invaded at a much lower cost, Shinseki was hushed and then forced out.
And as a direct result of this incompetent plan and inadequate troop strength, young soldiers were put in an untenable position. For example, young reservists assigned to the Iraqi prisons were called up without training or adequate supervision, and were instructed by their superiors to "break down" prisoners in order to prepare them for interrogation.


To make matters worse, they were placed in a confusing situation where the chain of command was criss-crossed between intelligence gathering and prison administration, and further confused by an unprecedented mixing of military and civilian contractor authority.


The soldiers who are accused of committing these atrocities are, of course, responsible for their own actions and if found guilty, must be severely and appropriately punished. But they are not the ones primarily responsible for the disgrace that has been brought upon the United States of America.
Private Lynndie England did not make the decision that the United States would not observe the Geneva Convention. Specialist Charles Graner was not the one who approved a policy of establishing an American Gulag of dark rooms with naked prisoners to be "stressed" and even - we must use the word - tortured - to force them to say things that legal procedures might not induce them to say.


These policies were designed and insisted upon by the Bush White House. Indeed, the President's own legal counsel advised him specifically on the subject. His secretary of defense and his assistants pushed these cruel departures from historic American standards over the objections of the uniformed military, just as the Judge Advocates General within the Defense Department were so upset and opposed that they took the unprecedented step of seeking help from a private lawyer in this city who specializes in human rights and said to him, "There is a calculated effort to create an atmosphere of legal ambiguity" where the mistreatment of prisoners is concerned."
Indeed, the secrecy of the program indicates an understanding that the regular military culture and mores would not support these activities and neither would the American public or the world community. Another implicit acknowledgement of violations of accepted standards of behavior is the process of farming out prisoners to countries less averse to torture and giving assignments to private contractors
President Bush set the tone for our attitude for suspects in his State of the Union address. He noted that more than 3,000 "suspected terrorists" had been arrested in many countries and then he added, "and many others have met a different fate. Let's put it this way: they are no longer a problem to the United States and our allies."
George Bush promised to change the tone in Washington. And indeed he did. As many as 37 prisoners may have been murdered while in captivity, though the numbers are difficult to rely upon because in many cases involving violent death, there were no autopsies.


How dare they blame their misdeeds on enlisted personnel from a Reserve unit in upstate New York. President Bush owes more than one apology. On the list of those he let down are the young soldiers who are themselves apparently culpable, but who were clearly put into a moral cesspool. The perpetrators as well as the victims were both placed in their relationship to one another by the policies of George W. Bush.
How dare the incompetent and willful members of this Bush/Cheney Administration humiliate our nation and our people in the eyes of the world and in the conscience of our own people. How dare they subject us to such dishonor and disgrace. How dare they drag the good name of the United States of America through the mud of Saddam Hussein's torture prison.


David Kay concluded his search for weapons of mass destruction in Iraq with the famous verdict: "we were all wrong." And for many Americans, Kay's statement seemed to symbolize the awful collision between Reality and all of the false and fading impressions President Bush had fostered in building support for his policy of going to war.


Now the White House has informed the American people that they were also "all wrong" about their decision to place their faith in Ahmed Chalabi, even though they have paid him 340,000 dollars per month. 33 million dollars (CHECK) and placed him adjacent to Laura Bush at the State of the Union address. Chalabi had been convicted of fraud and embezzling 70 million dollars in public funds from a Jordanian bank, and escaped prison by fleeing the country. But in spite of that record, he had become one of key advisors to the Bush Administration on planning and promoting the War against Iraq.


And they repeatedly cited him as an authority, perhaps even a future president of Iraq. Incredibly, they even ferried him and his private army into Baghdad in advance of anyone else, and allowed him to seize control over Saddam's secret papers.
Now they are telling the American people that he is a spy for Iran who has been duping the President of the United States for all these years.
One of the Generals in charge of this war policy went on a speaking tour in his spare time to declare before evangelical groups that the US is in a holy war as "Christian Nation battling Satan." This same General Boykin was the person who ordered the officer who was in charge of the detainees in Guantanamo Bay to extend his methods to Iraq detainees, prisoners. ... The testimony from the prisoners is that they were forced to curse their religion Bush used the word "crusade" early on in the war against Iraq, and then commentators pointed out that it was singularly inappropriate because of the history and sensitivity of the Muslim world and then a few weeks later he used it again.


"We are now being viewed as the modern Crusaders, as the modern colonial power in this part of the world," Zinni said.
What a terrible irony that our country, which was founded by refugees seeking religious freedom - coming to America to escape domineering leaders who tried to get them to renounce their religion - would now be responsible for this kind of abuse..
Ameen Saeed al-Sheikh told the Washington Post that he was tortured and ordered to denounce Islam and after his leg was broken one of his torturers started hitting it while ordering him to curse Islam and then, " they ordered me to thank Jesus that I'm alive." Others reported that they were forced to eat pork and drink alcohol.
In my religious tradition, I have been taught that "ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so, every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit... Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them."


The President convinced a majority of the country that Saddam Hussein was responsible for attacking us on September 11th. But in truth he had nothing whatsoever to do with it. The President convinced the country with a mixture of forged documents and blatantly false assertions that Saddam was in league with Al Qaeda, and that he was "indistinguishable" from Osama bin Laden.


He asked the nation , in his State of the Union address, to "imagine" how terrified we should be that Saddam was about to give nuclear weapons to terrorists and stated repeatedly that Iraq posed a grave and gathering threat to our nation. He planted the seeds of war, and harvested a whirlwind. And now, the "corrupt tree" of a war waged on false premises has brought us the "evil fruit" of Americans torturing and humiliating prisoners.


In my opinion, John Kerry is dealing with this unfolding tragedy in an impressive and extremely responsible way. Our nation's best interest lies in having a new president who can turn a new page, sweep clean with a new broom, and take office on January 20th of next year with the ability to make a fresh assessment of exactly what our nation's strategic position is as of the time the reigns of power are finally wrested from the group of incompetents that created this catastrophe.


Kerry should not tie his own hands by offering overly specific, detailed proposals concerning a situation that is rapidly changing and unfortunately, rapidly deteriorating, but should rather preserve his, and our country's, options, to retrieve our national honor as soon as this long national nightmare is over.
Eisenhower did not propose a five-point plan for changing America's approach to the Korean War when he was running for president in 1952.


When a business enterprise finds itself in deep trouble that is linked to the failed policies of the current CEO the board of directors and stockholders usually say to the failed CEO, "Thank you very much, but we're going to replace you now with a new CEO -- one less vested in a stubborn insistence on staying the course, even if that course is, in the words of General Zinni, "Headed over Niagara Falls."
One of the strengths of democracy is the ability of the people to regularly demand changes in leadership and to fire a failing leader and hire a new one with the promise of hopeful change. That is the real solution to America's quagmire in Iraq. But, I am keenly aware that we have seven months and twenty five days remaining in this president's current term of office and that represents a time of dangerous vulnerability for our country because of the demonstrated incompetence and recklessness of the current administration.


It is therefore essential that even as we focus on the fateful choice, the voters must make this November that we simultaneously search for ways to sharply reduce the extraordinary danger that we face with the current leadership team in place. It is for that reason that I am calling today for Republicans as well as Democrats to join me in asking for the immediate resignations of those immediately below George Bush and Dick Cheney who are most responsible for creating the catastrophe that we are facing in Iraq.


We desperately need a national security team with at least minimal competence because the current team is making things worse with each passing day. They are endangering the lives of our soldiers, and sharply increasing the danger faced by American citizens everywhere in the world, including here at home. They are enraging hundreds of millions of people and embittering an entire generation of anti-Americans whose rage is already near the boiling point.


We simply cannot afford to further increase the risk to our country with more blunders by this team. Donald Rumsfeld, as the chief architect of the war plan, should resign today. His deputies Paul Wolfowitz, Douglas Feith and his intelligence chief Stephen Cambone should also resign. The nation is especially at risk every single day that Rumsfeld remains as Secretary of Defense.
Condoleeza Rice, who has badly mishandled the coordination of national security policy, should also resign immediately.


George Tenet should also resign. I want to offer a special word about George Tenet, because he is a personal friend and I know him to be a good and decent man. It is especially painful to call for his resignation, but I have regretfully concluded that it is extremely important that our country have new leadership at the CIA immediately.


As a nation, our greatest export has always been hope: hope that through the rule of law people can be free to pursue their dreams, that democracy can supplant repression and that justice, not power, will be the guiding force in society. Our moral authority in the world derived from the hope anchored in the rule of law. With this blatant failure of the rule of law from the very agents of our government, we face a great challenge in restoring our moral authority in the world and demonstrating our commitment to bringing a better life to our global neighbors.


During Ronald Reagan's Presidency, Secretary of Labor Ray Donovan was accused of corruption, but eventually, after a lot of publicity, the indictment was thrown out by the Judge. Donovan asked the question, "Where do I go to get my reputation back?" President Bush has now placed the United States of America in the same situation. Where do we go to get our good name back?


The answer is, we go where we always go when a dramatic change is needed. We go to the ballot box, and we make it clear to the rest of the world that what's been happening in America for the last four years, and what America has been doing in Iraq for the last two years, really is not who we are. We, as a people, at least the overwhelming majority of us, do not endorse the decision to dishonor the Geneva Convention and the Bill of Rights....


Make no mistake, the damage done at Abu Ghraib is not only to America's reputation and America's strategic interests, but also to America's spirit. It is also crucial for our nation to recognize - and to recognize quickly - that the damage our nation has suffered in the world is far, far more serious than President Bush's belated and tepid response would lead people to believe. Remember how shocked each of us, individually, was when we first saw those hideous images. The natural tendency was to first recoil from the images, and then to assume that they represented a strange and rare aberration that resulted from a few twisted minds or, as the Pentagon assured us, "a few bad apples."


But as today's shocking news reaffirms yet again, this was not rare. It was not an aberration. Today's New York Times reports that an Army survey of prisoner deaths and mistreatment in Iraq and Afghanisatan "show a widespread pattern of abuse involving more military units than previously known.'


Nor did these abuses spring from a few twisted minds at the lowest ranks of our military enlisted personnel. No, it came from twisted values and atrocious policies at the highest levels of our government. This was done in our name, by our leaders.
These horrors were the predictable consequence of policy choices that flowed directly from this administration's contempt for the rule of law. And the dominance they have been seeking is truly not simply unworthy of America - it is also an illusory goal in its own right.


Our world is unconquerable because the human spirit is unconquerable, and any national strategy based on pursuing the goal of domination is doomed to fail because it generates its own opposition, and in the process, creates enemies for the would-be dominator. A policy based on domination of the rest of the world not only creates enemies for the United States and creates recruits for Al Qaeda, it also undermines the international cooperation that is essential to defeating the efforts of terrorists who wish harm and intimidate Americans.


Unilateralism, as we have painfully seen in Iraq, is its own reward. Going it alone may satisfy a political instinct but it is dangerous to our military, even without their Commander in Chief taunting terrorists to "bring it on."
Our troops are stretched thin and exhausted not only because Secretary Rumsfeld contemptuously dismissed the advice of military leaders on the size of the needed force - but also because President Bush's contempt for traditional allies and international opinion left us without a real coalition to share the military and financial burden of the war and the occupation. Our future is dependent upon increasing cooperation and interdependence in a world tied ever more closely together by technologies of communications and travel. The emergence of a truly global civilization has been accompanied by the recognition of truly global challenges that require global responses that, as often as not, can only be led by the United States - and only if the United States restores and maintains its moral authority to lead.
Make no mistake, it is precisely our moral authority that is our greatest source of strength, and it is precisely our moral authority that has been recklessly put at risk by the cheap calculations and mean compromises of conscience wagered with history by this willful president.


Listen to the way Israel's highest court dealt with a similar question when, in 1999, it was asked to balance due process rights against dire threats to the security of its people:
"This is the destiny of democracy, as not all means are acceptable to it, and not all practices employed by its enemies are open before it. Although a democracy must often fight with one hand tied behind its back, it nonetheless has the upper hand. Preserving the Rule of Law and recognition of an individual's liberty constitutes an important component in its understanding of security. At the end of the day they (add to) its strength."


The last and best description of America's meaning in the world is still the definitive formulation of Lincoln's annual message to Congress on December 1, 1862:
"The occasion is piled high with difficulty, and we must rise - with the occasion. As our case is new, so we must think anew, and act anew. We must disenthrall ourselves, and then we shall save our country. Fellow citizens, we cannot escape history...the fiery trial through which we pass will light us down in honor or dishonor to the latest generation...We shall nobly save, or meanly lose the last best hope of earth...The way is plain, peaceful, generous, just - a way which, if followed, the world will forever applaud, and God must forever bless."


It is now clear that their obscene abuses of the truth and their unforgivable abuse of the trust placed in them after 9/11 by the American people led directly to the abuses of the prisoners in Abu Ghraib prison and, we are now learning, in many other similar facilities constructed as part of Bush's Gulag, in which, according to the Red Cross, 70 to 90 percent of the victims are totally innocent of any wrongdoing.
The same dark spirit of domination has led them to - for the first time in American history - imprison American citizens with no charges, no right to see a lawyer, no right to notify their family, no right to know of what they are accused, and no right to gain access to any court to present an appeal of any sort. The Bush Admistration has even acquired the power to compel librarians to tell them what any American is reading, and to compel them to keep silent about the request - or else the librarians themselves can also be imprisoned.


They have launched an unprecedented assault on civil liberties, on the right of the courts to review their actions, on the right of the Congress to have information to how they are spending the public's money and the right of the news media to have information about the policies they are pursuing.


The same pattern characterizes virtually all of their policies. They resent any constraint as an insult to their will to dominate and exercise power. Their appetite for power is astonishing. It has led them to introduce a new level of viciousness in partisan politics. It is that viciousness that led them to attack as unpatriotic, Senator Max Cleland, who lost three limbs in combat during the Vietnam War.
The president episodically poses as a healer and "uniter". If he president really has any desire to play that role, then I call upon him to condemn Rush Limbaugh - perhaps his strongest political supporter - who said that the torture in Abu Ghraib was a "brilliant maneuver" and that the photos were "good old American pornography," and that the actions portrayed were simply those of "people having a good time and needing to blow off steam."


This new political viciousness by the President and his supporters is found not only on the campaign trail, but in the daily operations of our democracy. They have insisted that the leaders of their party in the Congress deny Democrats any meaningful role whatsoever in shaping legislation, debating the choices before us as a people, or even to attend the all-important conference committees that reconcile the differences between actions by the Senate and House of Representatives.
The same meanness of spirit shows up in domestic policies as well. Under the Patriot Act, Muslims, innocent of any crime, were picked up, often physically abused, and held incommunicado indefinitely. What happened in Abu Ghraib was difference not of kind, but of degree.


Differences of degree are important when the subject is torture. The apologists for what has happened do have points that should be heard and clearly understood. It is a fact that every culture and every politics sometimes expresses itself in cruelty. It is also undeniably true that other countries have and do torture more routinely, and far more brutally, than ours has. George Orwell once characterized life in Stalin's Russia as "a boot stamping on a human face forever." That was the ultimate culture of cruelty, so ingrained, so organic, so systematic that everyone in it lived in terror, even the terrorizers. And that was the nature and degree of state cruelty in Saddam Hussein's Iraq.


We all know these things, and we need not reassure ourselves and should not congratulate ourselves that our society is less cruel than some others, although it is worth noting that there are many that are less cruel than ours. And this searing revelation at Abu Ghraib should lead us to examine more thoroughly the routine horrors in our domestic prison system.


But what we do now, in reaction to Abu Ghraib will determine a great deal about who we are at the beginning of the 21st century. It is important to note that just as the abuses of the prisoners flowed directly from the policies of the Bush White House, those policies flowed not only from the instincts of the president and his advisors, but found support in shifting attitudes on the part of some in our country in response to the outrage and fear generated by the attack of September 11th.
The president exploited and fanned those fears, but some otherwise sensible and levelheaded Americans fed them as well. I remember reading genteel-sounding essays asking publicly whether or not the prohibitions against torture were any longer relevant or desirable. The same grotesque misunderstanding of what is really involved was responsible for the tone in the memo from the president's legal advisor, Alberto Gonzalez, who wrote on January 25, 2002, that 9/11 "renders obsolete Geneva's strict limitations on questioning of enemy prisoners and renders quaint some of its provisions."


We have seen the pictures. We have learned the news. We cannot unlearn it; it is part of us. The important question now is, what will we do now about torture. Stop it? Yes, of course. But that means demanding all of the facts, not covering them up, as some now charge the administration is now doing. One of the whistleblowers at Abu Ghraib, Sergeant Samuel Provance, told ABC News a few days ago that he was being intimidated and punished for telling the truth. "There is definitely a coverup," Provance said. "I feel like I am being punished for being honest."
The abhorrent acts in the prison were a direct consequence of the culture of impunity encouraged, authorized and instituted by Bush and Rumsfeld in their statements that the Geneva Conventions did not apply. The apparent war crimes that took place were the logical, inevitable outcome of policies and statements from the administration.
To me, as glaring as the evidence of this in the pictures themselves was the revelation that it was established practice for prisoners to be moved around during ICRC visits so that they would not be available for visits. That, no one can claim, was the act of individuals. That was policy set from above with the direct intention to violate US values it was to be upholding. It was the kind of policy we see - and criticize in places like China and Cuba.


Moreover, the administration has also set up the men and women of our own armed forces for payback the next time they are held as prisoners. And for that, this administration should pay a very high price. One of the most tragic consequences of these official crimes is that it will be very hard for any of us as Americans - at least for a very long time - to effectively stand up for human rights elsewhere and criticize other governments, when our policies have resulted in our soldiers behaving so monstrously. This administration has shamed America and deeply damaged the cause of freedom and human rights everywhere, thus undermining the core message of America to the world.


President Bush offered a brief and half-hearted apology to the Arab world - but he should apologize to the American people for abandoning the Geneva Conventions. He also owes an apology to the U.S. Army for cavalierly sending them into harm's way while ignoring the best advice of their commanders. Perhaps most importantly of all, he should apologize to all those men and women throughout our world who have held the ideal of the United States of America as a shining goal, to inspire their hopeful efforts to bring about justice under a rule of law in their own lands. Of course, the problem with all these legitimate requests is that a sincere apology requires an admission of error, a willingness to accept responsibility and to hold people accountable. And President Bush is not only unwilling to acknowledge error. He has thus far been unwilling to hold anyone in his administration accountable for the worst strategic and military miscalculations and mistakes in the history of the United States of America.


He is willing only to apologize for the alleged erratic behavior of a few low-ranking enlisted people, who he is scapegoating for his policy fiasco.
In December of 2000, even though I strongly disagreed with the decision by the U.S. Supreme Court to order a halt to the counting of legally cast ballots, I saw it as my duty to reaffirm my own strong belief that we are a nation of laws and not only accept the decision, but do what I could to prevent efforts to delegitimize George Bush as he took the oath of office as president.


I did not at that moment imagine that Bush would, in the presidency that ensued, demonstrate utter contempt for the rule of law and work at every turn to frustrate accountability...


So today, I want to speak on behalf of those Americans who feel that President Bush has betrayed our nation's trust, those who are horrified at what has been done in our name, and all those who want the rest of the world to know that we Americans see the abuses that occurred in the prisons of Iraq, Afghanistan, Guantanamo and secret locations as yet undisclosed as completely out of keeping with the character and basic nature of the American people and at odds with the principles on which America stands.


I believe we have a duty to hold President Bush accountable - and I believe we will. As Lincoln said at our time of greatest trial, "We - even we here - hold the power, and bear the responsibility."